fairy (fairyfahrenholz) wrote in remember_furp,

Sentencing and Lessons Learned

 Today Reyna was sentenced.  Furp's Mom and I traveled to San Diego yesterday (multiple delays) and then drove 2 hours to Cabazon.  Slept a few hours, got up and arrived (mostly) on time to the courthouse in Joshua Tree.

Today has been difficult, but a relief at the same time.  It's done.  This part is over and we can move on and continue our healing process.

The jist is this.  He's not going to serve time.  He's going to be on house-arrest for 6 months with a SCRAM bracelet to monitor for alcohol use (if he drinks, he's in jail for the 6 months). 

After that, he will have 3 years of probation.  He has 1 strike against him, which in California means, you get 3 strikes and you spend the rest of your life in prison.  

He has lost his driver's license for the rest of his life, he will NEVER drive again in any state.

This was a felony, so he can no longer serve in the military or any government job, no longer have a passport to leave the country.  It will be a difficult life.

And I went into this very angry, holding onto my anger for Furp.  And what I saw when I got there was a 24 year old man that made a horrible mistake.  A 24 year old man that was very alone.

In some ways, we don't feel justice has been served Patrick.  He deserved more and better.  But I hope and pray that justice has been served Reyna.  That he heard those words I choked out in court today, holding back my tears (ok, I sucked at holding them back, but I tried, I get credit for that, right?!?)

At the end, I went to the bathroom and there he sat by himself in the hallway, staring at the floor, waiting for something in the process.  And I wasn't supposed to, but I walked up to him and simply told him that he needed to do right by Patrick.  And he told me would and I believe he will try.

He then offered an apology, weak, but an apology none-the-less (because really, how to do you apologize for that?!?).  I sort of snorted and said I was sorry too.

Which is true.  I'm sorry for the evil thoughts I've had about him over the past year.  I'm sorry for holding onto my hatred.  I'm sorry for continuing to vilify him. 

As Uncle Kage so astutely put it, how many of us can say we've never made a truly stupid mistake that somehow ended up OK?  Reyna fucked up and fucked up bad.

But I'm done being angry.  And it's time for the healing to truly begin.

So thank you to everyone for your support and to Chris and Ryan for being there with Lynne and I today.

Does it suck?  Sure does.

But it sucks doubly because not only was Patrick's life lost, but Reyna's future is shot.  And I can never be happy for that, to wish that upon anyone.
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